Being successful is part of who we are as a culture in America. We want to be successful in all our endeavors, especially that most important one of parenting. So, it stands to reason that I get a lot of questions from new parents regarding how to be successful at breastfeeding*. Things I hear a lot:
- “I wasn’t successful at breastfeeding my first two kids.”
- “I am so worried I won’t be able to successfully breastfeed.”
- “How many of your clients are successful, I mean, what is your success rate?”
Our culture is one that praises the Type A overachiever. We, as a culture, like weights and measures, and we measure productivity as precisely as we can, because that is how we can tell if we are being successful. When we are in school, we strive to get good grades. In sports, we aim to be the fastest or the strongest. At our jobs, we put in those extra hours to impress the boss and we fill every moment of our days with meetings and planning and cram sessions.
This is not how breastfeeding works. Despite what you may have read, despite what your mother/grandmother/sister/best friend/wife of the guy who works across the hall may say, breastfeeding is not all or nothing. Success in breastfeeding is not determined by whether or not your baby has never had a drop of anything other than milk from your teat since the moment they were delivered into your arms. I have seen breastfeeding success mean so many things to so many people.
- A mother who induced lactation for her adopted baby, and her surrogate baby…at the same time.
- A father who uses an SNS to feed his baby at his chest.
- A mother who has insufficient glandular tissue and decides to nurse at the breast for comfort but to give formula in a bottle for the majority of her baby’s nutrition.
- A working parent who pumps during the day for bottles, and then breastfeeds at night and in the morning.
- A parent struggling with PPD who decides to wean early.
- A parent struggling to wean her 4 year old.
- A baby who was in the NICU for several weeks before latching for the first time at a month old.
- A mother who survived cancer, who pumps to increase her supply on her remaining breast to satisfy her baby’s needs.
I will never give a potential client my “success rate”, because I am not the one who defines what success means to my clients. I will sit down with them, evaluate their situation, their life, their home and their goals. Together, we will come up with a plan to help them define, and in many cases, redefine, successful breastfeeding. Sometimes, this doesn’t involve a breast at all, and that is ok. No matter what happens in your early parenting journey, I will help you feel supported, loved, and empowered. With me, parents define their own breastfeeding success.
*I use breastfeeding, for brevity’s sake, but this includes all forms of lactation, including chestfeeding.